Frequently asked questions

What is this?

A satirical, participatory artwork: a fictional bureaucratic tribunal that issues real, sealed, verifiable documents ruling on your small dilemmas, for a filing fee.

Is this artificial intelligence?

Yes. The institution is written: its charter, its law, and its members, with their voices, grudges, and histories, are the work of a human author. Each session is then performed live by a large language model, which is what lets your ruling be composed for you alone, in the moment, read by no human eyes but yours, by a bench that keeps its precedents and grows its history with every filing. An authored world; a live performance; a one-of-one document.

Is it advice?

No. It is entertainment, and occasionally it is accidentally wise, and it is still not advice.

Is my filing private?

Yes. Rulings go only to you. The public verification page confirms a case's date, panel, and outcome; it never shows what you filed. The QR code printed on the document itself (the registry mark) opens the full document, so only people you choose to show the document to can ever read it. Whether anyone else ever sees it is entirely your decision: share the entertainment, or file it away. Filings are linked to your email only to keep your filing history and apply the rehearing rules.

My filing was struck and I wasn't refunded. Why?

A striking is a ruling. The panel convened, deliberated, and found your matter outside its jurisdiction; that deliberation is what the fee purchases, and the strike document is yours to keep. (Filings we decline to process at all are refunded in full.)

Can I refile the same matter?

You may, and the Committee will convene for it, possibly with different members, always with fresh deliberation; and then the prior ruling will stand, because prior rulings stand. Different show, same ending. The Petitioner's persistence will be noted in the record. A genuinely different matter is, of course, a new filing, heard on its own merits.

Why did my friend get a judge I've never seen?

Panels of five are drawn from the Committee. The composition of panels is not discussed.

Why do people call it CRUMB?

The Committee's name is the Committee for the Resolution of Unresolved Minor Business. The Committee does not recognize informal designations. It is aware of them. Awareness is not recognition.

What is a Filing Book?

A book of several filing stamps issued under a single number, at a reduced fee to filing one by one. Useful for cleaning house: several small matters, settled in a sitting. Also suited to the slower pleasure of learning the bench one ruling at a time. The number is the book: it can be spent, gifted, or lost, and only one of those is recommended. Filing Books are not yet available; their arrival will be noted in the weekly Session Report.

Who is behind this?

The Author. See the About page. The Committee, for its part, does not comment.